Buuut I really am grateful for being able to work tonight because I feel like it has given me the opportunity to reflect on the past year and what a shitty year it was. please excuse me for swearing but I cannot describe it any other way. This year was I would say the hardest. I do NOT want to jinx myself but with my parents getting divorced, getting promoted at work, being a nursing school student and just trying to keep my family okay and hold it all together for everyone has been exhausting to be delicate. It's been tough. I'm really not a good juggler and I am too much of a people pleaser and a giver that I seem to just put everything before myself and then It just gets so hard to balance it all at the same time.
Now I'm not trying to get a pity party or anything I am just pumping myself up for 2012. I'm shaking off 2011 and moving on baby! I will tell you this because I did survive 2011 and managed to come out of probably the toughest semester with A's and B's, not die of exhaustion or a panic attack from a bunch of employees quitting on me AND still have mom, dad and ALL us kids in the same room opening presents on XMAS now that is a friggin miracle. This year has given me the confidence in myself and really shown me what I am made of... I can survive so BRING IT BI!!! Hahaha
There is one thing that has been amazing and completely constant during this whole mess of a year and that is my marriage to the greatest ever. Sterling freaking Turley I have no clue what I ever did to deserve you but man....I am one lucky wifey. I can't imagine how I would have made it through 2011 without you. Thank you for dealing with my stress, anxiety and spaz attacks. Thank you for being patient and fighting through the year of hell with me and for loving me when I have neglected you for my homework and probably other things that may have seemed critical at the time . I promise I do not love studying more than I love spending time with you. Thank you for not taking my bull crap and for wrestling me when I get snappy and bratty... I get taken down probably once a day I know I'm not easy to deal with buuut you just do it so well @$$ face. ;-) Hahahaha
Anyways I gotta end with some 2012 goals and mine are the following:
Say NO more often... I always do things I don't want to do to please others! BUT this year Lacee Funknasty Turley is NOT gonna be a push over...THE END.
Be more patient with others any myself... I freak out when I don't see the results that I want or need quick enough and that is a super bad quality for me to have.
Be more forgiving. I have a bad habit of dropping people like a rock once they burn me...I have trust issues to the nth degree. It's something that I really need to get better with.
Surround myself with POSITIVE people....I never really realized how sensitive of a person I was until just recently. We learned about something called "contagious anxiety" in mental health class and I have like the biggest case of that. I like peace and positiveness! This year I have had my fair dose of drama and crazies so why would I hang out with you if you just make me an anxious freakazoid whole time?! Not in 2012! No more misses stressed pants!
Complain less... Correlates to the previous post. There is nothing worse to me that enduring biotching and moaning especially when it isn't going to change anything or the end result...your just wasting your time and my time so move on and get over it. Sterling I'm sorry I complain to you the most but you always know what to say to make me shut up and laugh...and feel better.
Be less angry.... Sometimes driving in Utah just brings out the very worst in me. It's like I turn into a whole different person and before I know it I am swearing like a sailor and doing things that a Lady would NEVER dare to even dream of doing. So this year I am going to suppress my middle finger which I am not proud of using on occasions when cruising in Utah. BUT YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND how awful Utah drivers are. I gotta breathe deeper or something when I drive... Rar.
Drink more water. Hi my name is Lacee and I am a caffeine-aholic. It's been 8 hours since my last Dr. Pepper and I consider that an accomplishment for me. Pray for me.
Run more.... I love running I need to do it more often. It's one of the few times where I feel free.
Sing my freaking heart out... I sing in the car like a psychotic person but it just makes me feel pretty good. When I sing loud, hard and probably sound like a cat being strangled it makes me feel like I'm getting rid of all of the bad and anxiety . Idk... It's fun and it wakes me up in the morning... I'm glad I don't have carpool buddies this semester :-x I will spare them this time.
Be healthier... Sometimes I eat too much or I just forget to eat because I live out of my car and I am always on the run. I am going to cook more and be better at feeding us healthy yumminess and hopefully save some moolah along the way.
Don't get pregnant....yet! Helloooo! I am only 22 I have like the rest of my life to shoot babies out like a cannon ball! My husband has never traveled before I wanna see a little bit of the world with him AND I wanna make some money man! I don't think it is a crime to wait a little while to have babies. I'd rather have em when I feel prepared to have them so that I can actually ENJOY my children instead of stress balls when they do come. Plus I wouldn't mind enjoying Mr. Turley for a few more years either ;-).
I'll probably come up with more goals in me head later on but I hope that everyone has a great 2012! ;-)
This little one for sure pulled me through 2011. Word to the wise: If you are into pure joy and happiness get yourself a doodle! I just love my Boogee girl.
I can tell 2012 is going to be epic already me, ster and boogee against the world. BRING IT!
love,
The lace face ;-)
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