Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Sometimes I think I have great thoughts.

I don't know anything about blogging. I am a beginner for sure. I'd like to be good at it so that I can share my thoughts about life and hopefully bring happiness to others by my craziness and MAYBE, just maybe find somethings in common with the outside world. Hopefully I won't be the only person sincerely asking myself "Am I crazy?" more than five times a day. I titled this "Lace's Life" because it it my blog and I'm going to share my life  and funny things about life in general from my point of view. If anything this will be a good way for me to journal things that I'd like to remember just in case I get amnesia or contract some form of dementia so I can look back and actually remember.

Sometimes my best thoughts come in to middle of the day or like tonight when I am trying to sleep and I just suddenly jolt wide awake and cannot go back to bed. I remember vividly I was dreaming about Zyprexia which is an anti psychotic medication I am supposed to know for my final tomorrow. I know that sounds like its pretty intense and that I must be smart or something but in reality, I am only dreaming about it because I am too dumb to think about it when I am awake and attempting to study... bugh. That thought process led me to think about my clinical experiences or "hospital rounds" that I have had these past two semesters and wow.... have I experienced some pretty freaking awesome things. SO that lead me to thinking that I MUST record these experiences somehow! Since I have a callus the size of Africa on my writing hand I decided...Why not make a blog?! So that is what I decided to do tonight to keep me entertained during my state of insomnia. TADA.

I know my life is so entertaining and no one is probably going to read this which its fine because I can just print this off and put it in a makeshift journal to show my grandchildren.... maybe they will care? Either way I know I am not cool but I just gotta write down these sweet and hilarious memories that I think that are hilarious that happen to me all the time during nursing school.

The first one is actually quite a tender experience and it is for sure my #1.  Last semester we were doing our "rounds" at a nursing home that specifically treated Alzheimer's and Dementia patients and there happened to be 2 clients that were in the "dying process" meaning that they were gonna go at any minuet. Which is really sad I know, but it was also really amazing at the same time because I got to be there and care for them and be one of the last people that contacted them while their spirits were still on this earth. One client just happened to be really high up in the LDS church and it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. Of course I knew where he was going! HELLO?! If he wasn't going to heaven there is no way in heck I got a shot at making it! It was so sad to see him struggling. The amazing thing though is he was completely comatose "unconscious" and whenever his daughter would whisper in his ear "I'm here Daddy, it's me Jane Doe" he'd pucker his lips to give her a kiss. I couldn't help by just bawl my head off. Here is a man that isn't conscious at all and, is holding on by the last threads of his life  AND suffering unimaginably and his first reflex is to pucker his lips and kiss his daughter.... If that isn't a measure of what kind of man he was then I don't know what is. I don't get outwardly spiritual because the spiritual experiences that I do have are very personal to me and I hold them so tight in my heart that I get nervous to be vulnerable enough to share them. All I can say is that it was an absolute honor to be able to be in the presence  of a man who I know without a doubt would be going to the best place imaginable in just a few short moments or hours. I may not be the most spiritual person ever but I know that there were angels in that room just waiting to escort him to heaven. And whatever that may sound so dumb to some of you but I know what I felt and those feelings were undeniable. I am so grateful for the tender experiences and I am honored that I got to even have that experience. Its moments like that which make all my struggles with school bearable and moments like that, that make me look forward to being a nurse. Those little moments are worth more than gold to me and are totally worth any and every struggle I may ever go through ;-).

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